newborn

Vulnerability & the act of putting oneself “out there.”

This is what I am doing now. I’m committing to the unknown and preparing for the onslaught of challenges in “becoming.”

Intimidating.

Terrifying.

As I write these words at first they seem insignificant, almost meaningless.

I gaze at them for a while and realize that those words tender and innocent as if within my cupped hands I hold tiny little beating hearts. I can feel their warmth, fragility and desire to be to be recognized and heard.

A long time ago I discovered how much I loved writing stories, it was always my favorite unit in elementary school right thru to university (creative writing). Then and now I fully expect the doors to be battered down and the “fraud police” to wrangle me to the ground and escort me out of here because I don’t know what I am doing. Or at least that is what I think or so “that” voice in my head tells me.

I think that because I am scared, I am vulnerable and I’m exposing myself to judgement, to the identities of the unknown. Amanda Palmer taught me a lot when I read her novel the Art of Asking. She introduced me to the beginnings of vulnerability, fear and identified the fraud police so beautifully. Brene Brown taught me so much about creativity’s birthplace through shame and vulnerability. Had I not learned about the good that comes from fear, vulnerability, learning to ask and receive help I would not be here today writing this… and in the birthplace of my new brainchild.

So to add to the above words there are two more

“I’m excited.”

 

 

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